How to Deal with Narcissistic People and their Families
Dealing with the self-absorbed narcissistic personality is challenging.
Therapist Wendy Behary used to wonder why she felt so “triggered” when she had clients displaying narcissistic traits in her therapy room.
She found herself giving in to their demands, apologizing when she didn’t do anything wrong and was on the defensive when they behaved critically or obnoxiously towards her.
Before she learned to really understand them and developed methods of dealing with them, she struggled when they came into her office.
As Wendy says:
“[Those with narcissistic personalities] seem well-assembled and self-assured, sometimes with a saccharine wit,” and that they can also “quickly pull the rug out from under you, reducing you to boredom, tears, apprehension, or disgust without a flinch.”
If you’ve ever had to deal with someone with narcissistic traits, you likely can relate to Wendy’s experience.
“I really enjoyed this great course. Wendy is brilliant. She has deep insight into the character of the narcissistic personality, and her passion for working with them shines through. The role-plays she does with herself throughout the course were so helpful.
I came away with tangible ways to work with this population, especially in couples therapy. Rather than being wary and on the defensive when a narcissistic person expresses anger or obnoxious behavior, I can remain in control and be curious about their behavior. One of the best courses I’ve done in a long time!”
Relationship Therapist,
Sydney, Australia
AND
You May Not Want to Have Anything to Do with Them
If you’re like most therapists, you value the connection – the relationship you develop with your clients. The rewards of being a therapist are in this connection and how you use it to help your clients heal.
Since it is challenging to build strong rapport with people who have narcissistic traits due to their complete self-absorption, it can feel unrewarding and hopeless to make any progress with them.
BUT…
You May Be Unable To Avoid People Who Have Narcissistic Personalities From Showing Up In Your Life Or Therapy Office
And when they show up, it behooves you to have some skills under your belt so you can deal with them without pulling your hair out or feeling like you need to go see your therapist afterward.
When you have a deep understanding of the psychology underneath narcissistic behavior, you’ll be more sturdy when a narcissistic person puts up roadblocks or behaves critically or manipulative.
Understanding narcissism helps you be more objective – you experience their behavior less on a personal level. You’ll feel less “triggered” and more in control.
And, if you’re a therapist, you can be more real with them. And the more genuine you are, the more likely they will be to come to trust you, and the more likely you’ll be able to make progress with them.
Knowing What Drives The Narcissistic Personality Helps You, As A Therapist, Be More Successful With Couples, Spouses Of Those With Narcissistic Traits, And Clients Who Have Narcissistic Parents
Knowing what drives narcissistic behavior helps you be more successful with couples, spouses of narcissistic people, and clients who have narcissistic parents.
Many clients can’t avoid their narcissistic parents. And, spouses for many reasons, choose to stay in intimate relationships with them.
Once you understand the motivations behind narcissistic behavior, you’ll be able to help therapy clients set better boundaries with them and cope better with their behavior.
“The course was incredibly comprehensive, covering all aspects of working with narcissistic clients. I greatly appreciated that Wendy gave examples of what her clients say and how she responds to them. Wendy’s responses demonstrated incredible grace, sincerity, and empathy.
Wendy’s method of using audio recordings and photos to help her clients develop empathy for themselves is powerful. I look forward to incorporating this technique in my work with clients.
Wendy captured my attention for the entire course. The course leaves no doubt that she is an expert in this field!”
Licensed Clinical Psychologist,
San Francisco, California
For over 25 years, Wendy Behary has been devoted to treating those with a narcissistic personality as well as partners, and other others who have to deal with them.
Wendy is the author of “Disarming the Narcissist: Surviving and Thriving with the Self-Absorbed.” She is also a contributing author of several book chapters on using schema therapy to treat narcissism, and she lectures internationally on narcissism and dealing with difficult people.
In addition to Wendy’s specialty in narcissism, she is the director of The Cognitive Therapy Center of New Jersey, Founding Fellow of The Academy of Cognitive Therapy, and former International Society of Schema Therapy (ISST).
Wendy shows you how narcissism forms in childhood and how it’s essential that you understand these underlying forces if you’re a therapist who wants to help them or their family members effectively. You might be surprised to learn that the origins are not the same for all those with narcissistic traits.
In addition to being an expert on narcissism, Wendy is a schema therapy expert. Wendy explains the various schemas and modes that underlie narcissistic behavior in this course.
She shows you the difference between a schema and a mode and discusses how knowing these modes and schemas help you make progress with narcissistic personalities.
To say that those with narcissistic traits have unmet childhood needs seems obvious. These people are highly suspicious, do not trust easily, and are often unaware of the impact of their negative behavior on others.
As a therapist, in addition to being empathic, Wendy will show you how being genuine and honest about how you see the narcissistic behavior can help these clients.
Wendy explains the role narcissism plays in relationships and the types of partners narcissistic people tend to choose.
Wendy addresses the question, “Are those with narcissistic traits capable of loving someone?” And if so, “Under what circumstances can they love?”
There are few people who may “trigger” you as much as those with narcissistic characteristics do. How do you stay grounded and hold your own with these people when they are doing everything they can to make themselves look good and you look bad?
Here, Wendy’s methods shine as she models how she stays grounded and prevents herself from reacting to her narcissistic clients when they’re criticizing, blaming, and attacking her.
As you can imagine, when working with clients with narcissistic traits, there are many hurdles you must overcome.
Wendy shares the primary condition that needs to be in place if you have any hopes of making headway in therapy with these clients. She also shares her view on the possibilities for strong therapy outcomes.
Wendy believes that empathy is a highly misunderstood concept and when you see how she uses it, it’s no wonder she says this. Watching her model this skill is truly amazing.
There is no doubt you’ll learn from Wendy’s ability to demonstrate deep empathy and combine it with highly useful and unique tools as she helps those on the narcissism spectrum repair their core wounds.
Wendy explains the key issues when working with a couple where one partner is narcissistic. She assesses the core emotional needs that have not been met in each partner and addresses the maladaptive and adaptive behaviors of each person, showing how to work with them in therapy.
Wendy also shares a case example of a couple in couples therapy and explains how to work with them.
The Narcissism Epidemic – Interview With
Dr. Jean Twenge [Audio & Transcript]
In this fascinating audio interview, Dr. Jean Twenge discusses the rise of narcissism in society due to the increasing encouragement of self-indulgence in our culture.
She shares 4 specific influences that shape and reward narcissism and are causing detrimental consequences to all aspects of society.
Jean M. Twenge, is Professor of Psychology at San Diego State University and is the author of more than 140 scientific publications and books. She co-authored with Keith Campbell, the book, The Narcissism Epidemic: Living in the Age of Entitlement is available on Amazon.
Dr. Twenge frequently gives talks and seminars on teaching and working with today’s young generation based on a dataset of 11 million young people. Her research has been covered in Time, Newsweek, The New York Times, USA Today, U.S. News and World Report, and The Washington Post, and she has been featured on Today, Good Morning America, CBS This Morning, Fox and Friends, NBC Nightly News, Dateline NBC, and National Public Radio.
Surviving Childhood With A Narcissistic Mother Interview With Candace Plattor, M.A., R.C.C
[Video, Audio & Transcript]
Candace grew up with a narcissistic mother and knows first-hand how difficult dealing with narcissism can be.
In this interview, she openly describes what her upbringing was like, how she coped, and how she came to heal as an adult. Candace also shares her wisdom for helping clients who grew up with a narcissistic parent heal.
Candace Plattor has been an Addictions Therapist in private practice in Vancouver, BC for more than 25 years. She is the author of the book, Loving an Addict, Loving Yourself: The Top 10 Survival Tips for Loving Someone with an Addiction, and she helps addicts and their loved ones in her signature Family Addiction Therapy Program.
Co-parenting with a Narcissistic Parent – Interview with Susan Stiffelman, MFT [Video, Audio & Transcript]
In this interview, parenting expert, Susan Stiffelman discusses how she works with co-parents of those with narcissistic behaviors.
She shares strategies for co-parents to help protect their children from the damage caused by these people.
Susan co-facilitates an online membership community with Wendy Behary called, Co-Parenting with a Narcissist. She is also the author of the bestselling book, Parenting Without Power Struggles: Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids While Staying Cool, Calm and Connected, and Parenting with Presence: Practices for Raising Conscious, Confident, Caring Kids (An Eckhart Tolle Edition).
Ghost Mothers – Interview with Kathy Rudlin, LCSW
[Video, Audio & Transcript]
Kathy unlocked the mystery of her own family’s dysfunction and in doing so, ignited a passion to help others do the same.
She shared her journey in the book, Ghost Mothers: Healing From the Pain of a Mother Who Wasn’t Really There.
Kathy has trained extensively with Wendy Behary & Jeff Young, receiving her advanced certification as a Schema therapist. She currently runs a private therapy practice in San Diego and is the director of the newly created California Schema Therapy Training Program.
Working With Partners Of Those With Narcissistic Traits – Interview With Dr. Elinor Greenburg
[Video, Audio & Transcript]
In this lively interview, Dr. Elinor Greenburg brilliantly discusses issues for partners of those in a relationship with someone who has a narcissistic personality.
You’ll learn how Dr. Greenburg works with partners and spouses and signs to look out for when dating someone with a potential narcissistic personality disorder.
Dr. Greenberg is an internationally renowned Gestalt therapy trainer who specializes in teaching the diagnosis and treatment of Borderline, Narcissistic, and Schizoid adaptations in a lively and practical way.
She is the author of the book: Borderline, Narcissistic, and Schizoid Adaptations: The Pursuit of Love, Admiration and Safety, an Associate Editor of Gestalt Review, a faculty member of the New York Institute for Gestalt Therapy and of the Gestalt Center for Psychotherapy and Training in New York.
Resource List On Narcissism
The resource list has a good selection of books, blogs, articles, Facebook groups and support groups for lay people and therapists alike.
“The course was extremely helpful on both a personal and professional level.
I have a whole new perspective on narcissism. I can view narcissistic people as being hurt individuals, as opposed to people who are only out for themselves.
I also now have more acceptance and empathy for my narcissistic mother. And, I learned new strategies that will be helpful with clients who are in relationships with those with narcissistic personalities.
There was so much useful information in this course – It was incredibly comprehensive. Wendy did an amazing job!”
Licensed Professional Counselor
Intern, Dallas, Texas
When you join us for this course you’ll be able to attend a 1-hour Q&A Webinar live with Wendy Behary or, you can submit questions ahead of time. Wendy will answer any question you have about dealing with those with narcissistic personalities and their family members.
Yes, the webinar will be recorded.
The video and audio recording will be available within 48 hours after the webinar ends.
Can’t make the live Q&A webinar?
No problem.
Simply send us an email with your questions and Wendy will answer them on the live webinar. You can then listen to the recording afterward.
NORTH AMERICA
Thursday, February 25, 2021, from 3-4 pm Pacific/6-7pm Eastern
UK
Thursday, February 25, 2021, from 11-12 pm
AUSTRALIA
Friday, February 26, 2021, from 10-11 am,
Sydney time
NEW ZEALAND
Friday, February 26, 2021, from 12-1 pm
“This course was so interesting and timely! I’ve been seeing a few people like this in my practice and Wendy answered all the questions that I had.
I feel like I have a much better grasp of the nuances of this complicated personality. I never learned this much about narcissism anywhere before!
I was impressed with Wendy’s calm demeanor when working with people who have narcissistic personalities. She does the delicate dance between being sensitive yet firm with them so incredibly well.
I realized how grounded the therapist has to be to not be pulled into the strategies used by narcissistic people when they criticize, manipulate, and blame in order to avoid dealing with their own pain.
I was so stimulated and inspired by the content of these videos that I didn’t want to stop watching them. Thanks for the opportunity to take this excellent course! It was rich with important information that all therapists need to know.”
Sensorimotor Psychotherapist,
South Surrey, B.C.
“I don’t know how Wendy does it. She is so Zen about working with those with narcissistic personalities.
The way she presents is fantastic. I loved the parts when she quotes narcissistic clients and then says how she responds to them. Was she ever dead on. Wow… oh my gosh, the way she effortlessly holds the empathy with them even when they are being difficult is such gold.
I admire and respect her for how effective she is. I think this course will sink in with me over time. It will help me with the young people I work with in showing empathy for their parents. Thank you!.”
Licensed Psychologist,
Berkeley, California
This course will NOT be offered again until next year.
If you’re thinking about enrolling, you probably don’t want to wait until the last minute to register…
You have 7 days from your date of purchase to check out the course. If you decide the course is not what you want, we’ll refund 100% of your fee.
“This course came along at exactly the right time. I had a recent experience with a couple in therapy where I got triggered and fell for a narcissistic person’s manipulation.
I realized I had messed up and went home that night and couldn’t sleep. I went back through Wendy’s book and then was thrilled to have the opportunity to take this course.
The course helped me put meat on the bones, to flesh out her book, all of which reconfirmed my realization that the client had fooled me.
It was fantastic to see Wendy and directly experience the way she works. I loved learning about the techniques she uses when working with clients. It’s definitely a worthwhile course if you want to learn about the narcissistic personality and become, as Wendy says, “sturdy” enough to deal with them.”
M. Couns., PACFA Reg. Clinical,
Sydney, Australia
Yes, This course includes lessons on working with the narcissistic person and couples in couples therapy.
The course is mostly geared for therapists, but it’s useful to those who may have a narcissistic person in their lives and want to understand and cope with the person better.
It’s both. All modules and bonus interviews for the course are pre-recorded. You’ll have access to them as soon as you register. You can watch the videos, listen to the audios, and/or read the transcripts at your convenience.
We also have a Live 1-hour Q&A Webinar with Wendy Behary where you can get your questions answered. If you can’t make the live webinar, you can submit questions ahead of time and Wendy will answer them on the webinar.
LIVE Q&A WEBINAR DATE AND TIME:
DATE AND TIME OF THE LIVE Q&A WEBINAR WITH WENDY BEHARY:
We have a live 1-hour Q&A Webinar with Wendy Behary where you can get your questions answered. If you can’t make the live webinar, you can submit questions ahead of time and Wendy will answer them on the webinar. You can then listen to the recording afterward.
The live webinar will be held on:
If you can’t attend the Live Q&A Webinar, you can submit questions ahead of time.
Wendy will then answer your questions on the webinar and you can listen to the recording afterward (video and audio recordings will be available within 48 hours after the live webinar is held).
Yes. The video and audio recording of the live webinar will be available in the Learning Center within 48 hours after it is held.
The course has a total of 11.5 hours of instruction.
This includes the 18 pre-recorded modules, 5 bonus videos, plus the Live Q&A Webinar.
We will give a certificate for the course indicating that the course was 11.5 hours long.
We have a 7-day refund policy. You can check out the course within 7 days of registering and if it’s not for you, you can ask for a full refund.
Australians
Members of the Australian Counselling Association can apply for 10 OPD points.
Other Countries
We do give a certificate that indicates you have completed 11.5 hours of training.
You may be able to submit this for CEUs or professional development through the organization you belong to.
ou will have access to the materials in the learning center for 180 days (6 months) from the date you signed up for the course.
However, you can download all materials and save them forever.
“I feel empowered! I have a lot more empathy to work with this population and have much more to offer the partners and co-workers of those who have to deal with a person with narcissistic traits.
I took my time looking for quality training with depth and scope, and boy did I find it with the Mind Body Training Institute! I read and watched all of the bonus pieces and got major nuggets from each.
The addition of Juliet and Clinton’s presence throughout the course made the experience much more accessible. The questions and reflections they raised were like having like-minded conference participants “with” me throughout the course.
I am very much looking forward to the next training you offer! Sold!”
Therapist,
Toronto, Ontario
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