Repairing Betrayal: A Neurobiological and Attachment-Based Approach for Couples

A 4-part live webinar series taught by Dr. Stan Tatkin, founder of the well-known Psychobiologcial Approach to Couples Therapy ® (PACT).

Dr. Stan Tatkin

The Wounds of Betrayal Trauma Are Deep and Complex— Therapy Requires A Proven and Structured Path to Repair

Here’s why it’s essential to understand the full impact of betrayal and what is necessary for therapy to be effective:

1. Betrayal Takes Many Forms
It’s not just affairs — secrecy, lies, addictions, and broken trust show up in many ways that deeply affect clients.

2. Betrayal Trauma Impacts the Nervous System Causing PTSD-Like Symptoms

Betrayal triggers trauma responses that affect regulation, attachment, identity, and a client’s ability to feel safe in the relationship.

3. Therapy Mistakes Can Worsen the Pain

Without proper training, therapists may unknowingly rush the process or minimize the depth of injury.

4. Betrayal Reshapes the Relationship at Its Core

Unhealed betrayal impacts every part of the couple’s connection — from safety and intimacy to communication.

5. Digital Betrayals Are on the Rise

Online affairs, sexting, and secret digital lives are becoming more common in therapy rooms—and therapists need to know how to navigate these often hidden but deeply damaging ruptures.

6. Repair Demands a Precise and Structured Roadmap

Betrayal work demands a slow, deliberate pace, a clear structure, and specific interventions that honor the depth of the wound and offer deep healing.

7. Ethical, Effective Care Requires Specialized Skills

Healing demands the ability to hold both partners with clarity, containment, and care—while guiding them through the complexity of repair.

This training offers the structure, insight, and tools you need to work with betrayal trauma confidently and effectively.

"Thanks to Stan, I Can Now Guide Couples Through the Long Road of Betrayal Recovery."

What led me to become certified in the Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy (PACT) model — is how it brings together three critical areas: neuroscience, attachment theory, and arousal regulation.

Before studying with Stan, I felt stuck in my couples work especially when working with a betrayal. Therapy felt  mostly cognitive and top-down. PACT offered something profoundly different: a bottom-up, body-based, and relational approach that targets the real issues between partners in real time.

Stan’s model has been invaluable in helping couples navigate betrayal. It has taught me how to recognize the profound nervous system impact betrayal has on the betrayed partner — and how to support couples
in repairing trust through fairness, justice, accountability, and co-regulation. Rather than rushing to “move on,” it’s about genuinely rebuilding a new, securely functioning relationship.

Stan is an exceptional educator. He makes complex concepts, such as brain science and attachment theory, accessible, practical, and deeply relevant to betrayal in couples therapy. His approach has transformed how I work. It has made a profound difference for the couples I work with.

I’m incredibly grateful to have found PACT and to have trained under Stan.

Melissa Ferrari

Registered Clinical Psychotherapist and Supervisor, PACT Certified Couples Therapist, Sydney, Australia

Meet Dr. Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT Teacher, clinician, researcher, and developer of the Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy® (PACT)

Dr. Tatkin is best known for developing the Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy® (PACT). He’s recognized globally for his work on secure-functioning relationships and is a sought-after speaker and educator. His work emphasizes fairness, justice, and sensitivity as key elements of secure attachment and healthy partnerships.

He has written dozens of academic articles and six bestselling books,
translated into several languages. His TEDx talk has been viewed by over 1.7
million people. Stan also works directly with couples through his clinical practice in Calabasas, California, and co-leads Wired for Love retreats
 across the U.S. and Europe.

In addition to his clinical and teaching roles, Stan has contributed to the
field through positions such as assistant clinical professor at UCLA and
board member of the Lifespan Learning Institute. 

Here’s What You’ll Gain By Taking This Course:

  • Understand the Neurobiological Architecture of Betrayal – Learn how betrayal trauma activates the brain’s threat systems  — so you can intervene effectively when clients are overwhelmed or dysregulated.

  • Identify and Work With All Forms of Betrayal — Not Just Affairs – Recognize betrayal’s many forms — including gaslighting, secrecy, financial deception, and emotional affairs —so you don’t overlook the hidden dynamics that shape your clients’ distress.

  • Structure the Early Phase of Treatment with Clarity and Safety – Learn exactly how to conduct initial interviews, gather essential facts, and create structure in the chaos of betrayal — helping both partners feel contained, protected, and ready to do the work.

  • Apply the DICE Therapeutic Architecture for Betrayal Repair – Use Stan Tatkin’s DICE model — Discovery of Information that Changes Everything — to guide the pacing of disclosure, containment of reactivity, and movement toward safe and effective repair.

  • Intervene Effectively in States of High Arousal and Threat – Develop moment-to-moment tracking and co-regulation skills to manage sessions when emotions run high — allowing you to stay grounded and help clients stay engaged in difficult conversations.

  • Hold the Couple System as the Client — Without Losing Neutrality or Empathy – Stay attuned to both partners — even when the injuries are severe — by using PACT’s core principle that the couple, not the individual, is the client.

  • Support Secure-Functioning Roles Within the Couple System – Help the discovery partner regain agency and safety while guiding the secret-keeper toward accountability, transparency, and trustworthiness — so both partners move toward a healthier relational system.

“Since 2008, None of My Couples Have Returned Presenting with Another Betrayal.”

I had avoided working with couples, but when I attended a talk by Stan Tatkin not realizing it was focused on couples, everything changed…

I was so inspired that I signed up to study his model (PACT), started working with couples, and never looked back! Now, couples work is my favorite type of therapy.

Stan’s integration of interpersonal neurobiology, attachment theory and arousal regulation offers the depth I’d been craving. It gets to the root of what’s really going on when a betrayal occurs in a way that no other model I’d been exposed to has.

What I love most is how PACT holds complexity. Whether I’m working with a cisgendered, hetero couple or a queer couple in their 20s or their 80s—this model holds. I don’t have to switch gears or find a new framework; it just works.

When it comes to betrayal trauma, PACT is absolutely uncompromising—and that’s what makes it effective. Betrayal is an assault on the basic trust in a relationship, and Stan shows how to speak the truth when working with couples. His model teaches therapists how to hold the betraying partner accountable in a way that’s honest, humbling, and essential for healing. That kind of boldness is rare—and so necessary.

If you’re a couples therapist, learning Stan’s approach to betrayal trauma will be one of the best investments you ever make. Betrayal appears most often in couples therapy, and the model gives you the clarity, structure, and depth to offer true healing.

PACT not only repairs the rupture of the affair, but it also offers complete healing and rebuilds the relationship towards secure functioning.

Dr. Krista Jordan

Psychologist, Austin, Texas

The course details are below, but if you're ready to sign-up, here you Go...

1 payment - $447

$297

2 MOnthly payments - $227

2x $157

Topics in the 4 Live 90-Minute Webinars

Live Webinar 1:Understanding the Landscape of Betrayal trauma (90 minutes)

Live Webinar 1: Understanding the Landscape of Betrayal Trauma (90 minutes)

 Here is what you’ll learn in Webinar 1:

  • Introduction to betrayal trauma in couples therapy
  • Types of betrayal beyond affairs (eg., financial, emotional, gaslighting, etc.)
  • The “DICE” effect: Discovery of Information that Changes Everything
  • PTSD-like symptoms in the Discovery Partner (DP)
  • Attachment styles and betrayal patterns (avoidant, anxious, disorganized)
  • Overview of the neurobiological impact on the amygdala, prefrontal cortex, hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal axis, and hippocampus

Live Webinar 2: First Steps in Therapy - Investigation and Structure (90 minutes)

  • Gathering facts: timeline, behaviors, and deception patterns
  • Detecting defensiveness, gaslighting, and withholding
  • Establishing a temporary power imbalance to protect the Discover Partner (DP)
  • Grounding techniques for the therapist during intense sessions
  • Recognizing red flags in early treatment

Live Webinar 2: First Steps in Therapy - Investigation and Structure (90 minutes)

Live Webinar 3: DICE Architecture and Therapeutic Sequencing(90 minutes)

Live Webinar 3: DICE Architecture and Therapeutic Sequencing (90 minutes)

  • Therapeutic roles: Discovery Partner (DP) as empowered; Secret Keeper (SK) as transparent and contrite
  • Session frequency and pacing
  • Full disclosure vs. formal disclosure
  • Facilitating questions from the DP
  • Tracking SK’s remorse vs. self-protection
  • When to allow mutual complaint vs. block moral equivalency
  • Therapist as reality anchor: Don’t shortcut the pain

Live Webinar 4: Repair, Regret, and Reconnection (90 minutes)

  • Role of regret and accountability in healing
  • Supporting the SK’s growth into a “villain-turned-hero”
  • Reinforcing the DP’s right to transparency and re-agency
  • Reestablishing shared purpose, mutual governance, and safety
  • Preventing “upside-down” dynamics
  • When therapy becomes maintenance vs. resolution
  • Case review: Secure functioning after betrayal-what it looks like

Live Webinar 4: Repair, Regret, and Reconnection (90 minutes)

DATES AND TIMES OF THE 4 LIVE WEBINARS

**You’ll get the most value out of the course by attending these 4 live webinars. You’ll be able to ask questions during the webinars.

However, if you can’t attend the live webinars, you can submit questions beforehand, as the webinars will be recorded. 

The video and audio recordings of the live webinars will be available within 48 hours of each webinar’s conclusion.

DATES AND TIMES OF THE 4 LIVE WEBINARS

4 Live Webinar DATES and Times

NORTH AMERICA

June 5, 12,19 & 26, 2025

3:00-4:30 pm PT 
6:00-7:30 pm ET

UNIted Kingdom

June 5, 12,19 & 26, 2025

  11pm- 12:30 am

AUSTRALIA

June 6, 13, 20 & 27, 2025

 8:00-9:30 am Sydney, Australia


You Also Get 3 Bonuses With This Course

Bonus 1: Resource List For Betrayal Trauma

Bonus 1:

Resource List for Betrayal Trauma

This Resource List includes resources and tools to support your ongoing learning and application of the PACT model in working with betrayal trauma. Whether you’re looking to expand your knowledge, share resources with clients, or explore related topics, this list helps you go further.

Bonus 2: Therapist Integration and Action Guide: Applying Betrayal Trauma Insights in Clinical Practice

Bonus 2

Therapist Integration and Action Guide: Applying Betrayal Trauma Insights in Clinical Practice 

This guide is designed to help you integrate key insights from the course into your clinical work using the PACT model. It offers a structured way to reflect on what you’ve learned, apply core concepts to real cases, and confidently take action.

Bonus 3: Summary Notes and Key Takeaways For All 4 Webinars

Bonus 3

Summary Notes and Key Takeaways for all 4 Webinars

This document distills the essential insights from all 4 webinars in one convenient place. With concise summaries, it’s designed to help you review key concepts, reinforce your learning, and bring new strategies into your clinical work—without rewatching hours of content. Perfect for busy therapists who want to integrate the PACT model for betrayal trauma with clarity and confidence.

  

"PACT Has Fundamentally Changed How I Work."

PACT is a comprehensive model that weaves together neurobiology, attachment theory, arousal regulation, and what Stan calls “shared principles of governance” for couples.

Whether it’s an affair, a secret bank account, or undisclosed information, PACT helped me understand that betrayal is not just a moral injury, but a psycho-biological rupture that causes acute distress for the betrayed partner and creates a massive power imbalance.

With Stan’s model, I learned how to help the overly entitled partner give up that entitlement and genuinely work to restore justice, while also supporting the discovery partner in reclaiming their sense of agency and safety.

When both partners are willing to stay the course, I’ve seen transformations that go beyond just relationship repair – I’ve witnessed real character development and personal growth on both sides.

PACT has fundamentally changed how I work. It’s practical, deeply humane, and grounded in the reality of how relationships actually function under stress.

PACT is not just about saving relationships – it’s about helping people become better partners and, ultimately, better humans.

Allison Howe

Certified PACT Therapist, Certified PACT Therapist, PACT Institute Faculty, Leesburg, Virginia

Not Sure This Course is for You?

Perhaps you’re on the fence about taking this course because you’re thinking:

  1. I don’t work with couples.

The trauma of betrayal often surfaces in individual therapy — sometimes unexpectedly. This course gives you concrete strategies to help betrayed clients overcome and heal shock, rage, and grief and to support clients who’ve cheated in exploring what led to the rupture and how to grow from it.

2. I’m already overwhelmed with other courses and responsibilities—I don’t have time for another course.

This is totally understandable. Your life as a therapist is likely very full.  If you don’t have time to fully engage in the live webinars, you can watch the replays later. You can consume the material when your schedule allows for it.

3. I already have a solid foundation in relationship therapy.

You might already address betrayal within the broader context of relationship distress—but betrayal trauma has unique neurological, psychological, and relational effects that often go unrecognized. This course helps you work more precisely and effectively with the hidden wounds that standard couples therapy may overlook.

4. I already use trauma-informed approaches—what more would I gain from this course?

Trauma-informed care is essential—but betrayal trauma brings a distinct set of challenges, including identity fragmentation, hypervigilance in intimate relationships, and a collapse in trust. This course gives you the tools to address these complex layers directly with a clear roadmap.

5. I’m not trained in PACT — I’m worried I won’t understand the material.

Dr. Tatkin explains the essential PACT concepts clearly and shows you how to apply them specifically to betrayal trauma. Whether you’re familiar with PACT or completely new to it, you’ll come away with practical tools you can immediately use with clients.

Perhaps you’re on the fence about taking this course because you’re thinking:

The bottom line is…

These 4 live webinars will equip you to understand the complexity of betrayal trauma and how to help couples heal and move on with their lives with a deeper connection than they had previously.

Ready to join us?

The course includes 6 hours of high-value content you can download and keep for life—featuring 4 live webinars and several practical resources.

Why not give it a go? 

If you don’t find value in the course after attending the first webinar, you can request a refund before the second webinar (by June 11, 2025).

1 payment - $447

$297

2 monthly payments - $227

2 x $157

Summary of What You Get in ThiS CoursE

  • 4, 90-minute live webinars focused on helping clients through the impact of betrayal
  •  Downloadable videos, audios, and transcripts of the 4 webinars
  •  Worksheets for each webinar to help integrate your learning
  •  Summary Notes and Key Take Aways for all 4 webinars 
  • Therapist Integration and Action Guide: Applying Betrayal Trauma Insights in Clinical Practice

  • A Resource List on Betrayal  Trauma
  •  The ability to download all materials and keep them forever (Yay!)
  •  Certificate of completion for 6  hours of instruction
  • Submit our certificate in Canada to CCPA for CECs and CRPO for PD credits 
  • PD points for PACFA and ACA in Australia
  • Money-back guarantee  – if you decide the course isn’t for you after attending the first webinar, you can request a refund before the second webinar (by June 11, 2025).

This course is packed with value—bringing together cutting-edge insights, real-world strategies, and expert guidance...

1 payment - $447

$297

2 Monthly payments- $227

2x $157

Frequently Asked Questions

This live 4-part webinar series is designed primarily for couples therapists and counselors, but it’s also highly relevant for individual psychotherapists, psychologists, psychiatrists, and other helping professionals who want to deepen their skills in working with clients impacted by betrayal trauma.

Developed by Dr. Stan Tatkin, The Psychobiological Approach to Couples Therapy ® (PACT) is a fusion of attachment theory, developmental neuroscience, and arousal regulation. PACT, and Dr. Tatkin have a reputation for effectively treating the most challenging couples. 

Yes.

The PACT (Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy) model developed by Dr. Stan Tatkin is an integrative approach that draws on several well-established areas of research. It’s a neuroscience-informed, attachment-based, and somatically attuned method.

Yes! The course includes numerous examples to help you apply the concepts in real clinical situations.

Yes! You can easily incorporate the principles of PACT into other models of therapy.

DATE AND TIME OF THE 4 LIVE WEBINARS

The 4, 90-minute live webinars will be held at the following dates and times:

North America: June 5, 12,19 & 26, 2025 from 3:00-4:30 pm Pacific /6:00-7:30 pm Eastern

UK: June 5, 12,19 & 26, 2025 from 11 pm-12:30 am 

Australia (Sydney): June 6, 13,20 & 27, 2025 from 8:00-9:30am

New Zealand (Auckland): June 6, 13,20 & 27, 2025 from 10:00-11:30am

1 PAYMENT OPTION:  $297 (Reduced from $447)
$297 CAD for Canadian residents (No GST)
$297 AUD  for Australian and New Zealand residents (Australians add GST)
$297 USD for Americans and all other residents.
 
2 PAYMENT OPTION:
2 monthly payments of $157 (Reduced from 2x $227)
2 payments of $157 CAD spaced 30 days apart (for Canadian residents – No GST)
2 payments of $157 AUD spaced 30 days apart (Australian residents add GST)
2 payments of $157 USD for USA and all other residents

If you don’t see value in the course after attending the first webinar, you can request a refund before the second webinar (by June 11, 2025).

You can download your certificate for 6 hours of course content once you pass the short course quiz.

USA
CEUs – We are not officially approved for most CEU’s. We will give you a certificate of completion for the course. You’ll have to check with your professional association or licensing board to see if they’ll provide you with CEUs.

Canada
CEC’s – CCPA (Canadian Counselling Association). CCPA will give CECs if you submit  your certificate to them.
PD credits – CRPO  (College of Registered Psychotherapists of Ontario) will give PD credits when you submit your certificate to them. 
If you belong to another professional association in Canada, you’ll have to check with them to see if they will give you credit for the course with your certificate. 

Australia
OPDs  – ACA (Australian Counselling Association)
5 OPD (Ongoing Professional Development) points

CPDs  – PACFA (Psychotherapists and Counsellors Federation of Australia)
6 hours of category A CPD

6

You will have access to the materials in the learning center for 180 days (6 months) from the date you signed up for the course.

However, you can download all materials and save them forever.

Get started

This is your ONLY opportunity to watch the webinar series live. Next year, the course will only consist of recordings of the webinars.

1 payment - $447

$297

2 monthly payments - $227

2X $157

"Since training with Stan, I can’t imagine working with betrayal trauma any other way."

Before training in the PACT model 10 years ago, my couples therapy sessions often felt like a “talk fest.”

While some clients made progress, I frequently felt something was missing, especially when helping couples shift the deep pain of betrayal trauma.

Sessions could easily spiral into blame, emotional shutdowns, or endless rehashing of past hurts without significant progress toward healing.

Integrating the core principles of PACT—neuroscience, attachment theory, and arousal regulation—was a game-changer. I finally had a framework that matched the complexity of relationships—and a roadmap for navigating the deep injuries of betrayal.

With Stan’s model, I learned how to stabilize couples quickly, anchor interventions in secure functioning and safety, and guide them through the emotional chaos of betrayal with greater effectiveness. My clients began to experience real, sustainable repair. Healing became something they could feel in the room, not just talk about.

Stan is a brilliant clinician and a gifted educator. He brings clarity, humor, and depth to every teaching moment, making complex ideas practical and accessible.

His approach is powerful and effective and cuts right to the heart of what matters most. I’m deeply grateful for everything I’ve learned from Stan. His influence has made me a better therapist, and my clients have reaped the rewards.

Clinton Power

Relationship Therapist, NSW, Australia

Take the course for a
test drive!

If you don’t see value in the course after attending the first webinar, you can request a refund before the second webinar (by June 11, 2025).

Register now...

1 payment - $447

$297

2 monthly payments - $227

2X $157

still have questions?

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